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Just call me “Li-Lo”…

March 14, 2009

You guys are so lucky!  Do you have any idea what I’m about to share with you?  No, no…you don’t – cause if you did you wouldn’t still be sitting down reading this.  You’d be running around your living room screaming “I’m not worthy of this honor!! I’m not worthy of this honor!!”

Since honesty is a rule with me I’m gonna put it all out there.  I’m going to detox.  I just can’t go any longer ignoring it.  I could potentially have 5-20 pounds of CRAP spackled to my intestinal walls that won’t be removed any other way except through a month long detox program.  Don’t worry, I promise not to share photos – I DO have standards, after all.

I’ve given myself today as my last “hoorah” for being such a wonderful person and I’m enjoying some naughty items without guilt.  Time check: 3:58PM and I’ve already consumed a quarter bag of Funyuns, a handful (or two) of Cool Ranch Doritos, 3 Samoas Girl Scout Cookies (how could I say ‘no’ to that bratty, little ankle biter?) and a beer.  No doubt my menu will be much healthier tomorrow and I’m counting on all of you to keep it that way for the next 30 days using techniques such as (and not limited to): shame, embarassment, harassment, guilt, humiliation, public intoxication, face slapping…

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3 comments

  1. You can count on me 100% to follow through on any and all of your suggested discipline techniques (shame, embarrassment, harassment, guilt, humiliation, public intoxication, face slapping….). If you fall off the wagon, I will be there to dish out any or all of the above to help get you back on track.


  2. I expect nothing less from you Nat.


  3. Hey, if you can’t count on family to do it, then who can you count on??



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